Saturday, August 30

Attack!

To understand what happened I must confess some oddities about myself.
  1. I have a fear of being stabbed
  2. I have a fear of taking showers when no one is home
  3. I have a fear of vacuuming when no one is home
  4. I am usually in a state of undress when at home, leaving me vunerable to attackers

They may sound strange, but they all make sense. The first is obvious - being stabbed sucks. If you take a shower when no one is home, you are completely defenseless; you're naked, you're wet, you may have soap on your face or in your hair or in your eyes, you're trapped in the shower with no way out, you can't hear anything. Same goes for vacuuming. Well, you're not wet, but if you're me, you ARE naked - or very near naked. And like most people, I hate being startled, because I lack any defensive reflexes. I just scream and stand there frozen.

So, I'm downstairs (in underwear) doing the laundry. I'm loading up the washing machine with clothes and the water is running. Suddenly, without warning, a man flies out at me from the doorway. My reaction is to cover my breasts and scream. It was my husband. In response to my reaction he asked, "Is that your defense?"

Please add doing laundry to my list of fears.

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