Bending Over

I'm having so much fun getting ready to leave for Shanghai. I believe that the best thing is getting screwed left and right. I hate dealing with all this bull shit right before we go, but since we're leaving in a half-rush, it can't really be avoided. We lack the time to be calm about things and wait around for anything better. So, which do you think is worse?

• Selling a car worth $4,000 for a measly $2,600 because of a stupid chunk of ice that you hit accidentally that makes the car squeak.
  
• Going to the bank to consolidate your student loans and working with an idiot who tells you that "they don't usually do personal loans for over $15,000 without collateral" and then try to explain that it's a STUDENT LOAN but then give up because she's an idiot.
  
• Waiting on hold with the IRS (after calling them every day on the hour - as "due to high call volumes the process you requested cannot be completed") and then have them tell you that your stimulus check, which was supposed to be direct deposited on May 2nd, won't be coming until you're on the other side of the world.
  
• Your work approves a 30 day leave of absence so that if things go wrong, you can come right back to your job, but then they change their mind and you stress about it for days and days wondering what to do.

I can't decide...

Pack More Than Once

If you are planning on taking a trip somewhere that requires an international flight be sure to pack strategically. I usually enjoy packing more than normal people. The process of packing belongings neatly into a suitcase soothes me. The delicious piles of clothing, the ziploc bags filled with toiletries, the curling iron (used before departure) wrapped in a hand towel to protect surrounding items from melting, the sound of the zipper when you close a perfectly packed bag, and the sound of the wheels on the walkway to the airport.

However, my packing zen has recently been interrupted by international flight baggage weight requirements. I had, as previously mentioned ... twice ... a somewhat fabulous closet and that closet contained a somewhat fabulous collection of clothing. I had already gone through all my clothes earlier for the garage sale and removed no-longer desired items. As I began packing I realized that this would not be sufficient "trimming" and that I would need to do more. How much more? A lot.

International flights only allow baggage to weigh up to 44 pounds. Now, I ask you, who can pack all their clothes in one suitcase and NOT have it weigh more than 44 pounds? But, the fees for overweight luggage are extremely high, and as we are already paying to check extra bags, I certainly don't want to pay the per pound price for overages.

So, I'm packing and re-packing my bag until it gets to an acceptable weight. I thought that I hated the scale before (when I was weighing in every Sunday) but now the scale is actually dictating what clothing can come with me. After every weigh in my husband turns to me and shakes his head. Then, I have to carefully take out those perfect piles of clothes and remove items that were desirable until only a few moments ago and pack those, less carefully, in a plastic bag destined for the garbage. Currently, my suitcase weighs in at 52 pounds. Which means I have 8 more pounds of clothing to relocate. I'm beginning to think it's impossible.

Buy a Ticket

Did you know that you can buy a ticket to Shanghai for a mere $1,450.00?

Of course, this price is per person, not including charges for extra bags and my ginormous suitcase which weighs over 50 pounds when stuffed to the brim with all my clothes.

Wow, we sure are lucky. I hate the airlines.

An Empty Closet

One of the only things I love about my current (soon to be ex) apartment is the closet. It's a fairly large walk-in with lots of space to hang my lots of clothes. It was truly a thing of beauty; only white hangers, hanging shelves for various items, clothing hung according to color.

It's empty now. And a part of me died with it. A closet is a part of someone's soul and mine is currently shoved into a red suitcase. Hopefully that part of my soul isn't lost over the ocean. Or left at LAX. Or stolen.

Yesterday my sister-in-law opened my bedroom door and was like "holy fuck" because the guts of my closet were spilled all around the bedroom to prepare for packing. Oops. No one was supposed to see that...

Sad Blog

Doesn't my blog look familiar? It's been looking the same, i.e. no new posts, for an entire week now. Well, I've been busy so don't give me too much shit. However, I feel for you (I think I have like 7 readers...) who haven't had something to love or hate for so long.

I'm officially leaving the country. Everything has fallen into place and we are leaving for real. The following things have prevented me from writing:

1. leaving my job
2. depression at leaving my job
3. anxiety about leaving my job
4. sadness at leaving my coworkers (most of them...MRSA aside)
5. overwhelming amounts of stuff in my apartment
6. taking said stuff and minimizing it to 7 tidy pieces of luggage
7. hanging out with family so we can be sick of each other to ease the parting pain
   
8. crying over my soon-to-be-sold car
9. eating as a coping mechanism

So, you can see why I haven't written. I'm in a total funk. If I thought that I was in limbo before, now I'm in purgatory. Everything is moving so quickly, but I can't remember what day it is so I can't keep up with time so it's (time, that is) slowly slipping away.

This is not to say that I'm not totally thrilled. My friend Conor said Shanghai is "the coolest fucking place in the world" which makes me think I'm pretty fucking lucky to be living there in the near future. I'll feel more like a human being rather than a pack animal when I get myself on the plane and have a cocktail. Until then, I'm hit or miss.

Ahh, stress. It's a killer.