Test Drive

You know what is fun? Don't have kids - just borrow them. Today I took my niece to the mall. I had to babysit her anyway, so I figured we might as well have a good time. We were there for about 2 hours, just strolling around and browsing. I asked her if she liked the shoes I tried on, to which she replied, "Yeah." (Of course, I don't believe anyone under the age of 2, so I didn't buy them.) I don't see why people are always saying their kids are so difficult - I mean, 2 hours is the same as a lifetime, right?. She was practically silent the entire time; just some cooing and ooing and googling at the water fountain. People commented on how cute she was, then they'd look at me with a puzzled smile - not understanding why my kid was white (as I am clearly not white) and not understanding why I don't know the exact age of my own child. But it didn't matter because we just went on our merry way. Happy and shopping. I did make a few observations on our experience:

• It takes a while to get the stroller out and the kid in
• I had to keep getting out more goldfish/animal crackers from the diaper bag
• The stroller bumped into a lot of shit because my stroller steering skills are at like level 1
• The kid wanted to share lunch with me. What?
• I had to use the elevator
• When you get out to the car you have to start the car and AC, put the kid in the car seat, then put the stroller in - being sure to triple check that the doors are both open and unlocked - just in case something goes horribly wrong
• They will fall asleep on the drive home and you will not be able to take them out without waking them...sorry, Mom

All in all, it was a lovely day. Maybe we'll try for kids in a few years.