Wednesday, September 17

Foaming at the Mouth

Please swallow.

There is nothing more disgusting than someone who speaks and spits and seems to have an excess amount of saliva flying out of their mouth at all times. Is there something wrong with swallowing? Perhaps swallowing is suddenly "so out" and drooling is in?

Well, if this is the case, count me in the out crowd. I swallow. I love swallowing so much I do it on a regular basis. This simple action helps me maintain a mouth that is not overflowing with spit, but is, instead, a fantastically polite part of my body which can offend only by the words coming out of it; not raining on my audience.

Now, I am well aware that some people's salivary glands work overtime. And for you, I sympathize. You are the people who hate to fall asleep in class because you wake up with a track of drool down your face and to the desk. You are the people who gleek when giving a long speech or lecture. You are the people who, when excitedly debating, must apologize for spitting on your friend. The unintended sleep-drooling can't be helped - but please, when you're speaking to me, swallow.

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