Thursday, February 4


I am one of those people who become hideously attached to things. And lately the world has done me a disfavor by trying to discontinue many products I consider vital to my existence. It started in the fall when I wanted to buy a duvet cover from Ikea...

"Do you know when you'll be getting anymore of these in?" I asked the sales girl (I say girl because she was younger than me)
"That line is being discontinued."
"No!" I shriek.
She nods her head in sympathy (false sympathy, I am soon to find out), "I know."
"Where can I get it now? Anywhere?"
"I guess you could look online, sometimes there are discontinued items there. Have you seen what is replacing it?"
Then she walks me over to a not-even-close-to-what-I-want duvet and says, "This is nice."
This is when I ask her if I can buy the floor model and when I begin to hate her.
"No, I'm sorry. I almost lost my job because I sold someone the floor model. We can't sell it if it's already been opened. Because, like, I don't know what could be on it, like blood born pathogens, you know?"

See? No sympathy. And, excuse me, Ikea, you sell opened shit all the time; it's called the "AS IS" section.

Anyway, so that happened. And sucked.

Next, I happened to notice that my particular brand of mascara was sometimes out of stock. But I didn't panic because it would be on the shelf next time. And then I would buy 2 of them, for good measure. However, now for the past couple months I CAN NOT find it. What am I going to do? I tried some new kinds, but I need the kind that curls your lashes because mine are pin straight. I'm almost out. I'm going to die.

And then there is this air freshener we like to use after the puppy goes number two. It's the best air freshener because it smells like green apples and fresh grass -- not like flowers and potpourri and old ladies. I snagged it the first time on a whim. The second time I noticed it was on clearance ... OH NO! ... and grabbed another bottle even though the other was still relatively full. And now? Gone. Never to be had again.

Don't companies realize that picky people like me need things that they like to be around FOREVER? (By the way, I do know that I will probably turn into an insane old lady.) There isn't always something better to replace it and then I'm stuck with mediocre crap that I don't like and dreaming about the good old days when stuff I liked was in stock.

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