Stress

I'm stressed.

I'm getting really anxious about this stupid GMAT I have to take for graduate school. I haven't had a stress dream for months but for the past two weeks they've been rearing their ugly heads. Usually they're just about some random stressful event happening, causing me to wake up with a back ache and a sore jaw from grinding my teeth. Also, I keep using the wrong "they're/their/there" -- an obvious sign of a distressed mind. I'm also freaking out (a little) because I have to finish my application for graduate school and then the actual MBA program. I'm already late for the graduate school application -- damn you, procrastination. And I need to start wrangling in my letters of recommendation for my MBA application. When I did my undergrad my dear and darling husband did all this shit for me. Apparently he shouldn't have because I am now ruined and spoiled and incapable of getting my act together and just APPLYING.

AND I'm getting nervous about being accepted. What if they don't accept me and I have to wait for spring semester? I really want to be done at age thirty. Thirty, not thirty-one and one quarter. I've been perusing the statistics of the last class and it appears that I'm at least a viable candidate:

• the average GPA was 3.4 -- mine is 3.67
• the average score on the GMAT was 583 -- I'm shooting for that to be my score
• only 14% female -- definitely in my favor

And studying for the GMAT is just reminding me how much I fucking hate math. Algebra is fine -- but most of it is quantitative reasoning, at which I suck. I've always done the worst on story problems. I don't seem to be able to extract the math from the English; I just feel like I'm reading a very dull tale. I'm taking a study/prep course on Saturday for the GMAT. Maybe that will assuage some of this anxiety. But as soon as I'm done with that I need to submit my graduate school application, finish my MBA application, register for the GMAT, apply for financial aid (fat chance of that), and then take a big deep breath.